Foto: Felicia Simion
I’ve
been hearing this a lot lately. People seem to try really hard to
find themselves through lots of methods. But in this rush of finding
themselves, they don’t stop and wonder “what does that even
mean?”. They don’t realize that “finding yourself” doesn’t
mean “looking until you find something that you like”, but
rather, accepting everything you find.
This
is the tricky part for most people, actually accepting what they’ve
found. And when they don’t accept it, they just keep on looking,
and tell everybody else that they “haven’t found it yet”. In my
opinion, though, this term of “finding oneself” is misused. The
thing is, we “find” ourselves constantly, without even looking.
All that we have to do is open our eyes and accept what we see.
People seem to be biased against being imperfect, and they therefore
try to change who they are. So they basically try to “find”
themselves, instead of trying to discover themselves, to create
themselves.
Now
what I think is, this whole “finding myself” thing is just
something to protect you of criticism. We are all afraid of not
sufficing – consciously or subconsciously. We are all aiming to be
everything people expect. And therefore, when we aren't content with
not sufficing, and not being everything people expect, we hide under
the phrase “I am finding myself”. Because that phrase gives us
the benefit of the doubt: I might not be everything I wish for right
now, but I will, at some point.
But
truth is, we never will be everything we wish to be. Because at the
end of the day, we can't just pretend that we don't know who we are.
We can't just think that denying a problem will actually solve it. So
instead of “finding ourselves”, we should, as I stated earlier,
discover ourselves. Or even better, create ourselves. But do not try
to find something that you're not able to accept, because that'll
never work. See, people aren't really trying to find themselves.
Rather, they're trying to find someone else, an ideal they aspire to.
They want to find in themselves, something that's not there.
See,
when I say something, or do something – may it be new or not – I
keep on discovering parts of who I am. If I like them, I accept them.
If I don’t, well, I also accept them, and try to change them. But
if I were to just disregard who I am right now, and start looking for
some other person, I would be wasting the person I already have. What
all the people who are “looking for themselves” say is that they
don’t know who they are, they’re wandering, and looking for “what
they’re supposed to be doing”.
But
I say that we’re not “supposed” to do anything, really. It may
sound harsh – and against everything you’ve believed in until now
– but you’re not here for a reason, really. You’re not meant to
be doing anything right now. We are not born to be great, nobody is.
You can either choose to be nobody, or you can choose to be somebody.
It’s all up to you, really. But hiding under the “I don’t know
who I am” speech will get you nowhere. You do know who you are, you
just don’t like it. But if you look at things the way I’m
looking, you’ll see that the person you are can be shaped without
being in a mission to shape it.
Articol scris de Raluca-Ioana Vacaru (XI B)
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